theChat.scot

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Talking about…Parts of my body are private

We can teach our children that parts of their body are private. We can help them understand that this means that no one (except their parent/main carer) should see or ask them about their private parts. This helps make sure they are safe.

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Chatting day-to-day

For 3- to 5-year-olds talking and learning is best done in a relaxed way, day-to-day as we get dressed, go to the toilet, use changing rooms, bath or shower, and chat. The kinds of things you can say and explain are suggested here.

Do you know what private means? When something is private it belongs to you. Your private parts are the parts of your body that people don’t see. Your private parts are covered by your pants.

(For a boy) Your private parts are your penis and testicles and bottom.
(For a girl) Your private parts are your vulva and your bottom.

I can or (insert details of your family as necessary) can ask you about your private parts or ask to see them to keep clean, or if you are not well. No-one else should ask to see or touch your private parts.

If a 3- to 5-year-old needs to see a nurse or doctor about something to do with their private parts you can explain then that you will be with them, and that the nurse or doctor is helping them to get better.

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Have you heard of the PANTS rule and the Pantosaurus?

In Talking About: Parts of my body are private (for 6- to 8-year-olds) there is information about the NSPCC PANTS resource and the fun Pantosaurus Song. If you think your 5-year-old might be old enough for this, take a look.

You can find out more about the PANTS rule here: Let’s talk PANTS with Pantosaurus! | NSPCC and the Pantosaurus Song is here: https://youtu.be/_SzbMEVYiyg?si=ytwikKaywHny15nt

You will find answers to these questions in the Questions Children and Young People Ask section. They can be a good start to any conversation:

• What is a vulva? Why do girls have a vulva?
• What is a penis? Why do boys have a penis?
• What are my private parts?

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Books

These books will give your child information about their body and help with conversations at home. Your library or nursery might have them, or you can ask a library if they will order a book for you.

A picture book designed for young children who are becoming aware of their bodies.

Using familiar scenarios there are opportunities to unpack and discuss these important topics.

Simple explanations for young children about body privacy and why private parts should be kept private.