theChat.scot

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Talking about identifying adults to trust/Who to go to with a question or a worry

From time to time every child will have a worry. As parents we can do our best to notice if something is worrying our child. We can also talk about what to do with a worry before they happen, and also who your child can go to; a simple approach is to use the idea suggested below.

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Who can I go to with a question or a worry? My 5

As you talk about how children get on with friends or at school, you can also chat about who your child can go to with a question or a worry. Of course you want that to be you, but it is also helpful that your child can identify other adults or older siblings who can help. These people can be in the family or at school, in a club they go to, in your church or community group. The way you can do this is to hold up your hand and with your child have a chat about five people they can go to with a question or worry – count them off, one finger at a time. You could make it fun too, write their names or draw their little faces on each finger. As you chat you can talk about: Why them? Are they good listeners? Are they easily available? Are they kind? And you can also check out: What would make me a better listener?

You could share the My 5 conversation you have with your child with other people your child has identified. You could do this together or ask permission from your child to share on their behalf. This means that those other people know that when your child comes to them it is because they have been identified as a trusted person.

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Support for you

Don’t forget that sometimes you need support to. Your child might come to you with a question or a worry that you feel is too big to manage on your own. Check out the More Support for Parents section of The Chat resource. If you need to chat, contact someone.

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Books

You might like to read these books together. Your school or library might have them, or you can ask the library if they will order a book for you.

Wherever Jenny goes, her worries follow her – in a big blue bag. They are with her all the time – at school and at home. Jenny decides they must go, but who will help her get rid of them?

Ruby loves being Ruby. Until, one day, she finds a worry. At first, it’s not such a big worry, and that’s all right, but then it starts to grow. It gets bigger and bigger every day, and it makes Ruby sad. How can Ruby get rid of it and feel like herself again?

Everyone feels worried sometimes. But what if your worries came to life and started following you around? Now it’s up to Sohal to work out how to keep his worries under control – and have some fun while he’s at it.

A story for children whose worries have grown so big that they bother them almost every day.