Talking about finding and using sexual health services
As parents we want our teenage children to delay sexual activity until they are old enough to make good decisions and keep themselves safe and healthy. The law helps to do this by saying that the age of consent in Scotland is 16. As a family you might have beliefs or rules that encourage your teenage child to think about sexual activity in the context of loving relationships, or of marriage. Whatever your view, one of the foundations we can give them is an understanding of where to get support and information (as well as from you) when they need it.
There are ideas here to support your chats. One thing you might also want to do is a bit of research about where young people in your area can go. So, is there a dedicated young people’s clinic? Is there a free condoms service? Does your local GP feel like a friendly place for young people? You might also think about encouraging and supporting your child to use the local GP service independently on occasion, so they can build trust with the GPs.
Talking about sexual health
By this age your teenage child is likely to have had some classes at school that have talked about sexual health, but just to back that up you can explain what sexual health is like this.
Your sexual health is to do with your body, your relationships, being safe when you have sex and thinking about contraception. You have a right to be healthy, happy and safe. When you are ready, having a relationship and having sex should be a positive and pleasurable experience.
What is a sexual health service?
As well as support and information from you, if you want to encourage your teenager to find out about and use local services, this might help.
When it comes to your relationships and your sexual health, I am always here for you. But there areprofessional people and services that can help you to have good sexual health. A sexual health service is a place where you can get information and support about anything to do with sex and relationships. It can be at a sexual health clinic, a young people’s drop-in or our local GP.
At a sexual health service or clinic, you can get these things:
Free contraception and condoms.
Free pregnancy testing.
You can talk about relationships.
There is testing for STIs (sexually transmitted infections) if you ever need it.
There’s also advice and referrals for termination of pregnancy (abortion).
These services are for everyone – you are welcome whatever your gender or sexuality.
Can you get help, information or contraception before you are 16?
Young people can be confused that it is breaking the law to have sex before you are 16, but that they can still get information, support and services like contraception if they need them. You will want to be your child’s go-to trusted person, but you can also give them this advice, which they can also share with friends if they need it.
13-, 14- or 15-year-olds who are having sex, or thinking about having sex, might be worried about the law. But sexual health clinics see young people aged 13 and over. It is confidential. They will encourage you to talk with your parent or other adults you trust, but they are not allowed to tell your parent or carer. Confidential means keeping your stuff private. If you speak to a nurse or doctor at a clinic, they will keep your information private. They will check that you are safe. They will not share information about you unless someone is harming you or you are in danger.
For more on the age of consent look at Talking About: Age of Consent.
More about confidentiality
Your daughter or son might want to be reassured about confidentiality if they use a service. You can explain these things to them if that helps.
In sexual health services, all young people have a right to confidentially. No personal details or information about the tests or treatments can be shared with anyone outside the sexual health service without the young person’s permission, unless the health professional thinks that the young person is at risk of harm.
If you go to a GP, the same rules apply. Doctors and nurses have very strict rules on confidentiality. Everything a patient tells them – their personal details and medical records – are kept completely private.
A doctor or nurse might encourage a young person to tell a trusted adult if they think the young person needs help and support. If the doctor or nurse is concerned that a young person is in danger of being harmed, especially if they are under the age of 16, they may need to pass information to other professionals. This is called child protection. Even then will talk to the young person first before they tell anyone else, unless that would put someone at risk of harm.
Finding sexual health services
You can find services here: Sexual health clinics | NHS Inform
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